已经没有家了

这里会被我和bastard两头死牛搞垮

当然sister那小气的个性也功不可没

我没有家了

我没有家人了

我们不是家人了

他们都不知道

还是不要接受罢了

MONDAY 17 JANUARY 2011

First working day after a long week resting at home (I gained 1KG)

Pissed by backache and PMS? Search me...

Went to visit grandpa...

Heard that he may leave anytime, even in the sleep due to his weak heart muscle...

He can still talk and walk consciously; but look does tell the difference

He is wearing a very familiar pajama which was bought by dajie which dad has a similar too...

They are father and son, indeed

They look alike in the similar pajama

Grandma who broke her ankles is lying on the armchair

Met the bastard and my sister who are visiting grandparents

I just greeted them, "A, hello" but both of them ignored the greeting

While I were talking with grandma, they left

I had a good chat with grandparents thereafter

Think of visit them with babe again (to be discussed with babe)

Had discussed about visit herbal medicine sensei who can really cure the illness but the condition is to stand the smelly medicine for at least half of year!

Reaching my "home"... I feel bore

It is no more a "home"

They (mum, Wendy, Candy, sister and bastard) were having dinner

I went in and popped with 4JF but I just greeted him "hello" after I greeted mum, "Mum, I am home."

When passed by the table, I pretend normal and talked to mum and then air, "Wa, whoever finished the food pls stand up oh. Leave a space to me."

Then mum or Wendy teased me, "you are very fat mei? how big the space you need?"

Then I just talk nonsense lol

Then I moved to kitchen for hand washing. Then sister and bastard stood up one by one when I am approaching the table with rice.

I can't bend down so I kicked away the chair that had been used by bastard. That shocked mum and Wendy and reprimanded me softly. No chaos happens.

It is a very indigestible dinner

I feel like I am isolated

And ironically the person to be blamed is my loved one - mum

Anyway, I will bear with it if she likes their coming

The most I will just stay with my babe as he claimed he welcomes :p

Then the sister is being petty again

Sour Wendy as "ren jia"

"don't trouble renjia to change clothes"

Wendy soured her back,

"bastard, remember to collect the wines from renjia's factory"

I was talking with the maid while they were having a tiff

Heard that dad is always at home

On that day I quarreled with bastard and the sister, he was there and looked sadly

Ascertained that our thought is heard when we are praying...

Is whatever she said true?

Search me

MONDAY 20 DECEMBER 2010

1. Mum asked is Monday a public holiday to J

2. J was pissed and said "Just go. Don't ask."

3. Mum and I asked her nicely

4. J asked where are we going

5. Mum said Rengit

6. J said, Rengit only?

7. Mum said, ya

8. J said, why go back

9. Mum said, cleaning ya

10. J said, so boring. Go back for what

11. Mum said, have to clean

12. I asked J, if there is any leave left...

13. J said, used 7788 le

14. Then I asked, leave how many?

15. J said, no more for this year

16. Mum said, "don't know what is she saying" with a smile

17. I clarified no more or still have some left?

18. J shouted to mum and me, "don't ask anymore. Want to go then go!"

19. I shouted to her and bang the table, "we asked you nicely, what is your attitude?"

20. Mum tried to stop us

21. J said something I forget "impolite?"...

22. I said, "we talked to you nicely and that is your attitude. I am just quarreling with my SISTER. Just SISTER."

23. Then J stood up from table and stopped her dinner

24. Then the bastard shouted to Jewelle and Ryan, "Jewelle, Ryan, go home! We are not here to be shouted de! See le also dulan!"

25. I returned him, "Whoever see le also dulan!"

26. Mum said, "let Jewelle finish her dinner"

27. Jewelle also grumbled, "I haven't finish dinner yeee"

28. J just grab and drag her away. Jewelle cried sadly and loudly

29. Mum cried heart-brokenly as Jewelle didn't finish her dinner due to our quarrel. Also, the behavior of J and bastard leaving home without bothering mum's feeling!

My fault! My fault! My fault!!!

I told Candy, there must be a day, she must bring Mum and Marcus to the room. I will chop everyone! Everyone!

I don't need you all to remember my kindness! I don't need you all to remember who am I!

I am a walking zombie since the DAY!

I HATE BASTARD!

I will chop you! I will slice you into 108 pieces! I will drain your blood and throw into dustbin to prevent pollution! I will chop your bones into bits! I will feed your meat and flesh to crazy wandering dogs only. Poison to them! Only one good deed you can have! I will dig your eyes out! I will cut your tongue! I will chop your fingers one by one! I WANT YOU DIE NO COMPLETE BODY

Suffocation

How many days it is after 4th May, the most painful day?

I can't remember...

How long I don't talk to the most hatred, you know who?

I can't remember too...

What I can remember is, Christmas is around the corner but you are not around anymore...

It is totally awful...

Last Day of David Cheung

Today is the last day of David Cheung in GE.

Some people told me, let's celebrate.

Some people told me, it's great.

To his departure, I feel nothing.

I always do my best on my own stuff.

It did impress some.

Too bad it upsets him.

So I became his eyesore.

I don't mind.

As I can't be likeable to everyone in the company.

Nevertheless, I still do my best upon his request.

It is shocking when I realized he didn't include me in his good-bye email.

Until the moment, I finally realized his true self.

It's not always too late ;)

Morale of the story: 一种米养千种人

爸爸离开后的第164天

爸爸离开后的第164天 （15.10.2010），我在这里写了第一张帖子。

以往，回家的时候，转个弯我就会看到爸爸；不是站在外头抽烟看风景、就是坐在客厅里的躺椅上看电视。。。当他听到脚步声时，他会探出身体查看那是谁回来了。。。我就会给他一个大大的白痴笑容，不管距离会不会太远他看不到。。。

现在什么人都没有。。。我就的家里的人都不是我认识的。。。

今天W说我在不在家都没有差别，妈妈也附和。她说每个人有每个人的生活。我就反问她，那么对W和C也一样吗？她却没回答我。。。我算什么东西？根本就不是个东西吧！

最让我不能容忍的是每天看到我最恨的人。。。你不喜欢我说你小孩吵，就直接说回家。那你他妈的来都不要来我家！我看到你就恨不得一刀砍死你！

抱歉，这根本也不是我的家。就像我那敬爱的妈妈说的，她随时可以开门叫我出去。

我算什么东西呢。。。

。。。

不要跟我说什么你们没机会和妈妈说话。你们什么时候在家？而我又在这里生什么气？做妈妈的都没意见了，成天说每个人有每个人的生活他妈的言不由衷，我在这里狗拿什么耗子？

虚伪！讨厌我却装着没事。明明也讨厌他你们还能和他说话？看在J的面子上？说什么瞎话？恶心！！！！！！

我想消除记忆

驚人發現！　可幫你消除「不好」記憶

更新日期:2010/01/22 22:51 呂青倚

不管是地震還是風災，親身經歷這些苦難的人，一定很想把這段不好的記憶忘掉，紐約一個研究團隊，發現一種新方法，似乎可以幫助人類把不好的計畫整個消除，將來不再擁有恐懼，科技電影中，用電擊消除記憶的情節，或許有可能成真。

飛機意外、地震侵襲或是大海嘯，災難的降臨，在災民的心中常常留下揮之不去的創傷，很多面臨這種痛苦經驗的人，一定都很希望能擁有像電影「星際戰警」中的這項科技，靠著一隻閃光棒輕輕一點，就能消除所有不好的記憶，這樣的科幻情節，在未來可能成真。研究人員：「我們研究恐懼記憶，能被消除。」

紐約大學心理系研究團隊利用測量皮膚電導率的變化，試圖消除人們的內心恐懼，靠的就是對實驗者進行腕部輕微電擊。研究人員：「當你有輕微的驚嚇，我們能測出你對恐懼的反應，藉由測量你的皮膚感應器和流汗的跡象。」

就在電擊時，科學家不斷讓受試者看藍色正方形圖樣，好讓他們和恐懼聯繫在一起，接著再喚起實驗者對電擊的恐懼，開始進行記憶消除行動。研究人員：「如果我們取回了記憶，在某一段時間，我們可以干擾或是消除那個記憶。」

所謂的取回記憶，其實就是科學家趁著大腦最脆弱時，當恐怖記憶被召喚後的3分鐘，科學家再讓志願者看這些圖樣，而沒有採取電擊，藉著這段大腦處於不靈光時，來干擾大腦重新儲存記憶的過程，就可以消除不好的記憶。

這樣改寫記憶的方法，在醫學界是一個新突破，研究專家希望未來一旦能夠廣泛應用，就能幫助許多身心受創的患者，忘掉過去災難的痛苦，而不再有心理恐懼或創傷。

http://tw.news.yahoo.com/article/url/d/a/100122/8/1zaet.html